Has anyone ever said that to you, you’re anxious about an interview or a first date. “Just be Yourself”, but what do you do when you have no idea who that person is?
I am a daughter, I know that my behaviour reflects on all the people who raised me and am ever conscious of how I reflect on them. I haven’t always been, and I have seen the hurt and damage that caused and it is now an integral part of me to see myself as an extension of my parents and guardians.
I am a wife, and again am aware of how my behaviour makes my wonderful husband feel. I know that I have the power to lift his spirits as well as remove any and all motivation. I know that he is a grown adult with the same power over his own mind and I am not the only factor, but wanting to be a helpful and supportive wife, I am always thinking of his feelings, wants and needs.
I am a mother, a role-model for my children. Do I always get it right? Not a chance, but I am always trying and always mindful of the power I have in shaping who they are as people. The beliefs they form about themselves and the world around is directly impacted by the words and images I feed their plasticine minds with.
I find social situations very awkward, but I have my ritual of putting on my make-up and I naturally morph into the version of me that is outgoing, positive and ready to face any challenge. I am sociable, but I have learnt to be by building a rapport with those around me. I’m a listener and people find it easy to be around me, shine the spotlight on me however and I stutter, and have no idea what to say. the idea of “just being myself” is so alien to me. I don’t always know what song to put on, or what movie to watch and can spend an hour flicking through Netflix without watching anything and then turning it off because I’m bored.
I used to have no idea who I am, but although I still struggle with these things while I’m finding out the small stuff, through a lot of self reflection and through discovering hypnotherapy I know myself, and I love who I am. I know my values; I know my beliefs and although I still find I am happy to go with the flow on movies and music, my values are never compromised!
There comes a time when we all lose ourselves in the labels we have, be it son or daughter, husband or wife, parent, entrepreneur however we start to define ourselves, we play the parts we know until those parts become our own. It can be so difficult to sift through the sand to to reach the diamonds of who we are and if I could have had RTT to find out who I am 10 years ago, I would have in a heartbeat. Those situations when the only advice my friends could give me is to “just be myself” no longer fill me with fear, because I know exactly who I am and I am good enough!
If this resonates with you and you would like to know more about how you can get to know yourself, book a FREE 30 minute call where I can help you peel back those layers and find you.